The Journey Out

Unmasking Stress: A Journey from Silent Symptoms to Self-Care Empowerment

Beachum Family Tree Season 2 Episode 3

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What if stress isn't just a silent killer but also a sneaky shapeshifter, impacting every corner of our lives? Join us as we unpack the intricate relationship between stress and mental health, exploring how different types of stress, from the sudden acute stress to the lingering chronic stress, infiltrate both mind and body. Through personal stories and shared struggles, we explore how stress often masquerades as other health issues, undermining our well-being in ways we might not even suspect.

We share insights on how neglecting minor symptoms like headaches or fatigue can escalate into bigger health concerns and how essential it is to recognize these signs early. By discussing our own journeys, we underscore the value of slowing down, delegating, and leaning on those around us, including the divine wisdom and resources offered by God and our communities. Our conversation aims to empower listeners to acknowledge their limits, encouraging reliance on support systems to maintain a healthier, balanced life.

Packed with practical tips, the episode offers strategies for managing stress through effective time management, self-care, and setting boundaries. From mindfulness meditation to spa visits at World Springs, we cover a range of techniques to help lower cortisol levels and boost well-being. With these tools in your arsenal, you're encouraged to treat your body as a temple, nurture supportive relationships, and maintain open communication with loved ones, ultimately guiding you towards a more balanced and fulfilling life.

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Speaker 1:

Have you ever had a headache or a tough day and noticed that your stomach was in knots? That isn't just happening. That is your body letting you know about stress. So stress and mental health are both physically connected, and so today, what we want to do was dive into how stress impacts not only the body, but also the mind as well. So let's hop right in what is home care how do I navigate health care? How do I navigate?

Speaker 2:

healthcare. What do I do when I feel down and depressed?

Speaker 1:

I'm stressed. Am I enough? What can I do? What is this going to cost? All right, so stress. What is stress to you?

Speaker 2:

Stress to me is life. Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1:

Very much. They say life be life and stress is life. Stress is yeah, yeah, very much.

Speaker 2:

They say life be life and stress is life. Stress is things that happens in life. You know it can be minute, it can be yeah, it can be anything but things that you typically worry about.

Speaker 1:

Right, right.

Speaker 2:

They can cause stress.

Speaker 1:

Right. So just overall, I have two definitions here. The first one is acute stress. So acute stress is short term stress that occurs in response to immediate challenges or threats, such as meeting a deadline or narrowly avoiding an accident, and typically resolves once the situation is over, like just going throughout day that your day, going throughout your week, you're hit with acute stress.

Speaker 2:

momentary stress, okay, temporary stress working right uh, your job have deadlines, uh, you, uh. You have co-workers right that you have to deal with, right, the co-workers dealing with life, you dealing with life y'all come together one place to get a job done. That's stress, right, right, not only that after work, now you got the managed family right. You may have kids, you may have a love when you're life y'all come together one place to get a job done.

Speaker 2:

That's stress, right, right. Not only that after work, now you got the managed family right. You may have kids, you may have a love when you're taken care of. You may have something that you want to do for yourself that you're not able to do.

Speaker 1:

That can bring on stress, and so it's not a. It's not a matter of if you will be stressed.

Speaker 1:

It's a matter when, like, every moment can be a stressful moment for someone, so you will encounter stress at some point in time but then there's also chronic stress, which is a long-term, persistent stress caused by ongoing issues like financial problems or an unhealthy work environment, which can negatively impact physical and mental health over time. So you talked about like that work environment, right? So not only do you have to meet deadlines, which could be just a momentary, momentary stress, but also, if you don't like your work environment or the people that you work with, or your boss is not awesome and you just hate what you're doing, that's an overall stress that you will continue to feel daily, lifelong, right? So it's not like it's going to go away, that stress that you're holding onto, that you likely don't even know that you're holding onto?

Speaker 2:

Or what if you? Maybe you like the job, maybe you like the environment? But what if you have something deep inside of you that's calling you to do something bigger? Or greater but you cannot make that change because this job right now is paying the bills. So your calling your passion is is is dealing with you on the inside but yeah uh, the bills are dealing with you like no way, because you're preaching.

Speaker 2:

I didn't even think about how stressful ambition and dreams could be yes, yes, yes that's, that's wild, I didn't so I, I, you know, I, I know a little bit part of my story later.

Speaker 1:

But, but that's crazy. So yeah, ambitions and dreams could be be stressful as well. They're not inherently bad. Those are bad things.

Speaker 1:

But, you live in the day to day of this is my life. Now this is where I want to be, and that stress between the two. But also we have things in our body inherently that God gifted us, like our fight or flight. That is there to protect those things, like protect us against stress. But sometimes if our fight or flight is prolonged due to the amount of stress that we have or how we're living our lifestyle, it can actually be harmful to us.

Speaker 2:

So it can put you in a dangerous situation because you're not. Hey, you can be in a situation I don't know what that may be on the side of a rope putting on a tire on the car or your car broke down, but in that situation you're not able to detect that maybe I need to stand on this side of the road because of these other cars coming, because you can't sense or feel that danger, because of the stress of the moment yes, and it has suppressed you yeah that's crazy.

Speaker 1:

So I think overall we can see that stress doesn't just affect like just our mind because that's what we think inherently like. If I'm stressed it's, it's going to be me thinking or me doing something it's not just that, so like it affects the body if it's her body. So, yes, it does affect the brain. So if you, if you are super stressed, what? It does is it increases your cortisol levels. Uh, and that if you have increased cortisol levels it impairs, like, your memory and concentration.

Speaker 1:

I know that all too well uh all too well, uh, if you're super stressed and it can also affect your heart, so it can raise your blood pressure. It also can make you have heart disease or have a stroke or have a heart attack or the you know the multiple different things that it can do. Do there in and of itself also, most people probably do not know, but stress can also affect your immune system. So you compounding all of that stress can suppress your immune system, often making you more likely to get sick, illnesses, colds, right all of those things.

Speaker 1:

Also one other thing that probably people don't know the digestive system can be affected by stress.

Speaker 2:

Are you saying you can be constipated?

Speaker 1:

you can be constipated and you can have bigger, bigger problems than constipation, like irritable bowel syndrome like what ibs or something like that Like there's different things that can happen, you know when, when stress uh is into play also your musculoskeletal system. So a lot of people yeah a lot of people probably know this one too, like you. If you have stress, it can uh lead to things like um tension, muscle tension, headaches, uh headaches, uh chronic pain like that you might be dealing with so those muscle tensions, especially in your neck?

Speaker 2:

yeah, you have those little knots in your shoulders and you go get a massage and they just try to rub that knot up. Yeah, I didn't know that until, yeah, I knew it.

Speaker 2:

So tell me, tell me about a personal like time for you where you've seen stress actually impact you physically well, I'm all right at this time, working on the business, of course, right, uh, I didn't know, I was stressed right, I'm going through my day-to-day, like you say, deadlines, things I'm trying to do, trying to grow, trying to hire, and I'm just thinking everything is okay. You probably come, come to me, hey dad, what about this? Okay, it's okay, we're there, we like this, right? So, unbeknownst to me. You know my son he was having his first, my first grandchild. My mother she was dealing with illness and, as we're trying to get things together and work, and my son and he's coming in from Kansas and my mother dealing with this. I'm trying to figure out. I'm dealing with all these emotions, but I'm thinking at the time I'm taking it as okay. Hey, I got it.

Speaker 1:

It's cool.

Speaker 2:

You know what I'm saying. I know God got me, but I was just okay, I was just putting to the side, I didn't know I was suppressing it. During this time I was having chest pain, having a lot of chest pains, I was having headaches, I was um, feeling dizzy at sometimes, uh, body aching and hurting neck, shoulders, back, everything and one day I just broke down. I broke down and, in the midst of pain, my granddaughter room. I broke down, called my mom and I'm just breaking down and I don't know what's going on with me. Right, I don't know, I'm just breaking down. So I went to the doctor, told him about the chest pain.

Speaker 2:

They said it was anxiety, my blood pressure was high and I was dealing with all this when I thought I was fine right you know right so uh pushing through, pushing through and it could have been critical, because the people that I love and the people that I'm doing this for, which is my family, right, right and the people that we serve, I could have put myself in a position, unknowingly, that my health was at stake.

Speaker 1:

Right, and that's what you're right, right, I'm not going to give your age out.

Speaker 2:

No, I'm 45.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, he's 45 years old. 45, yeah, he's 45 years old. Right, he's 45 years old, and you know that comes with time. Even in with the wisdom that you have now at 45 years old, you couldn't even feel the stress no, no, no and like or or I would.

Speaker 2:

My body was showing me signs, but you couldn't, I didn't, I couldn't put two and two together and I think I think what's crazy about that?

Speaker 1:

because even at 27, like me right now, I just had an instance where I had to go, uh, and just figure out, like what's going on with me. Like lately concentration is off, just my brain is like every which way. Um, I'm fatigued and I'm like what the heck is wrong. I go to the doctor and she's like brie dude, I don't know how you're functioning right, you're running on fumes you're running on fumes and I'm like, okay, what, what is it?

Speaker 1:

what? Any boil down to stress. Yes, it boiled down to stress. She's like you have to let this go. Um, and and it affected me so much. I mean, and I'm talking about a long time dealing with the fatigue, with the concentration issue, just dealing with that, until I finally was like, what is what is this?

Speaker 2:

I did not think it was stressed because I'm like I'm fine, I'm dealing with the day to day you actually thought, hey, with your fatigue you was like hey, I got to get up and push through it because you felt like you was being lazy that was.

Speaker 1:

That's literally it. Like I felt like why am I? I'm 27 years old, I'm too young to be this tired. Let's just go. I need to go, I need to beat it. I think I got it and I it took me to sit down and be like, really, what's going on? And when you said that earlier about like dreams and ambition, that's me right. That's me on a day-to-day basis. I'm in the, I'm in the in-between. We have so much going on, so many cool, amazing things that God has blessed us with. And so, because I'm just that ongoing person, like, okay, how can we be better? How can we grow better? How can we serve more people? I'm in that we have so many ambitions and dreams.

Speaker 1:

I'm in that in between, I got to do everything to get to this from a to z right and I have to understand, I have to slow down, right, and I can't be a to z every day there's not enough time in a day to be a disease and so for that and me trying to get you to understand that, and we have.

Speaker 2:

We have a good support system and friends. That was also speaking with you. We had to learn the delegating task. Yep, to let this task go. To let this go, yeah, right yeah, and, and, and.

Speaker 1:

Sometimes you can feel like and this is not even talking about like just business right like you can put this for like family family life just life in general, like sometimes you do have to.

Speaker 1:

I had to learn to communicate, right, I had to learn to communicate how I was feeling and like, hey, what is something that you can help take on, that could help me? Or and vice versa, like when I was super stressed, it felt, it felt like again going from a to z, like hey, I have to do this all on my own. You literally have to see me, brie. We, we are a team.

Speaker 2:

We're a team. Well listen, we're a team and we got, we have a team. So exactly we don't have to figure it or do everything at one time. Yes, so you, so you like your daddy, right so?

Speaker 1:

but, but. But you kind of just hinted at the bigger picture, like God made fellowship. For a reason you have your spouse, for a reason you have friends.

Speaker 1:

For a reason you have kids, for a reason Like we need to lean on each other because we can't do like said life be life, and we can't do this alone like and we, and that's where the stress kind of like pounds on cows on, because we're trying to do everything on our own, when we have to understand if you, if you believe like I, believe god, god handles he handles and he puts people in our lives to also go along with us and to relieve some of that and also he hands, he God does handle it, but he also put people like you say in our lives to help us out, and he, he also have given us wisdom right right to search for knowledge, to, uh, I guess be a better right because he, he, yeah, that's the word I'm looking for.

Speaker 2:

So listen with me dealing with my stress, right, uh, and my anxiety and all that good stuff, right, and I say good because I'm, you know, right I had to go to a doctor. That doctor had to prescribe medication. Right, I have to, which I'm still in the process doing. I have to change change my diet Right. I have to exercise. Right, I have to do things different.

Speaker 1:

You talk to my doctor and again, listen. Like you said, he puts these things in place for a reason. So I can't just be like I'm a hand distress and I believe in God and I'm not going to do anything. So yeah, I have, I had to. When I have to change my diet, I actually have to do different things to kind of calm my brain down to keep it concentrated.

Speaker 1:

Now I have to make sure I'm taking my vitamins you know, doing different things, also adding in exercise that I do not want to do. It's just all these different things that you can do, but I mean that kind of goes into like the next piece I want to talk about like managing stress as a whole, like you want to manage about, like managing stress as a whole, like you want to manage your stress for better health. And I don't, I don't think people link, link stress and health together, like at all.

Speaker 2:

Right, uh, stress, uh, breaks down your body, yeah, uh, and they do it silently right to where you. You think you're okay, but that unknown stress is just really turning you down. Right, oh, it's a headache. Okay, let me take some Tylenol.

Speaker 1:

And keep it pushing.

Speaker 2:

Oh, my back hurt. Maybe I just need to bend over and pick this up. You know things. Your body is telling you something, right?

Speaker 1:

Right right.

Speaker 2:

And when your body is talking to you, it can be underlying stress.

Speaker 1:

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Speaker 2:

And for a free consultation, give us a call.

Speaker 1:

Yes, sir, all right, we're going to encounter stress daily. That's the acute stress, right, not to mention all the other things that might be happening that pounds on stress. But we're going to encounter stress daily, at any moment, and so we have to be able to manage that. And you can do that a few different ways, you know, and you have to find what fits best for you.

Speaker 1:

We I do recommend that you go and talk to your doctor yes, please talk to your doctor, right talk to your doctor, figure out what works best for you and what's going on with your body, uh, but one one of those things could be like mindfulness, meditation, so like maybe taking five to ten minutes a day can still like meditate, sit down. Uh, I don't know. You know they have all these different things, like these apps, they with the music to make you know all these different things they have. You want to reduce those cortisol levels as much as possible, because high cortisol levels not only, you know, deals with stress when you mess up. Like my doctor said, when you, when one part of your body makes mess up, it's a chain reaction so it just keeps. It knocks one thing off, then one thing off, then one thing off, one thing off, like it's just, it's it's one wrong thing can just start a fire meditation, prayer, prayer right reading your word right reading a book right right uh, maybe some alone time taking breaks

Speaker 1:

taking breaks going on a walk um deep breathing exercises. Yes, nobody talks about that enough, like we don't really understand just how great taking a few deep breaths can do what it can do for, like our body, lowering those those levels, like I don't think anybody. Um, I think before I talked to my doctor I didn't think anything about meditation one, because my brain does not stop long enough to just sit down and do it.

Speaker 1:

But she was like breathe, just breathe, yeah, and I'm like I'm breathing, what are you? But like, just breathe, be in the moment, relish the moment, take a deep breath and then start a new um exercise. We talked about that a little bit going out, doing something regular, uh, you know, regularly with your body what, what we, what we did this past weekend yes, spas yeah, yeah, uh.

Speaker 1:

I mean I mean the world has evolved right so much, like. I mean there's apps that you can get on your phone to help with with mindfulness and relaxation. There's now places that you can go and visit, uh. So we actually visited a place called uh world springs. Yes, in the colony.

Speaker 2:

Yes, uh and it was awesome amazing they have.

Speaker 1:

They have just so much. So, of course, you know, like the standard massages, right, everybody gets massages, from deep tissue to regular massage. You know that that stuff. But the way world uh springs has it is that there is 46 different mineral pools, yes, and and in these pools there are minerals that can help with things like brain function, cognitive ability. Uh, alignment, there's gastro, gastro anti-inflammatory chronic pain, nerve pain yes uh, there's saunas and there's cold plunges.

Speaker 1:

Like there's different things that you can do, and that was one of the things that my doctor was telling me, like maybe some cold plunge, because it just really alleviates those stresses, and so how long did you stay in the cold? Listen. I had about a good 10 seconds.

Speaker 1:

That was as much as I could do it was crazy cold but it was good it was good and so that all of those different things can release those stressors and kind of ground you back and kind of get you. Get you back right. You have to understand when your body is a temple right, how you treat it is what you will get back right. You know what I mean and so we do have to value like that example.

Speaker 2:

So if you drive in um, uh what a 1979, uh what old school colors or something, yeah, and so. So I was born in 79, and if I don't go get my my oil change right, or if I don't put the right, proper gas, put the proper oil, do the tune-ups for it right and guess what? Pretty soon that colors ain't gonna be too good, right right in 1979, now it's what?

Speaker 2:

2024, 25? Well, yeah, yeah. So if you don't take care of your body right, if you don't put the right things in it the right food right, the right uh meditation, prayer, the right uh exercise, right, uh, and and take some time to treat yourself right, to love on yourself and also love on the ones that surround you, yeah, it is, there's no longevity you don't, you won't last, you know, and so, um, those are all like just important things that you want to think about.

Speaker 1:

Sleep is also an important thing that you want to think also having someone to communicate with yeah, I think that's a big one right. Yeah.

Speaker 2:

When you have someone that you can communicate and tell how you're feeling, how you're doing hey, I'm not right right now to maybe cry on their shoulders all that plays a big part. And if that person loves you, that person would allow you to be free to open up right Right, love you. That person would allow you to be free to open up right, right. Of course you're going to be there for that person to uh, uh, give some advice, right, right, but at that time that person needs you just to listen yeah.

Speaker 1:

So social communication is like super important and I think, if just to be super practical, like if super practical time management is setting boundaries Like I don't. I don't think I know. For me that wasn't something that that I really kind of thought about. Um, not until you was you. One of your famous lines is write it down write it down.

Speaker 1:

And I've never write it down, kind of girl. I mean, I got a phone, I got internet, I got, I got a notes app, notes app I can just do, do, do and go about my business, but it's not in a place where I can see it all the time right, and so you're really key about writing it down. And it wasn't until I listened to you I'm like, okay, I'm just gonna write it down. He said right now, I'm gonna write it down. But really it helped me manage my time better and that's also a stressor for me. You know like if, if stuff isn't done in by the deadline or by certain times, that's like it overwhelms me. But so what I do to make sure that I'm staying on track now is I manage my time wisely. I got this set out on my calendar.

Speaker 2:

I know what I'm going to do at this time at this time, and so it helps me kind of stay on track and I'm not putting too much on my calendar because it's only 24 hours in a day and most of it's been sleeping you know, right, but that to-do list, yeah, right, especially for you guys that if you're taking care of a loved one, right, or you're busy, you work and you got your family to take care of, a to-do list will help, right, making that to-do list or making time on your to-do list to be intentional with yourself oh that's great that's good because if you have everything else going on throughout that day, yeah put on that to-do list.

Speaker 2:

Hey, you know what I need 30 minutes, maybe even an hour, to myself To breathe, to breathe.

Speaker 1:

I don't, you know.

Speaker 2:

whatever it may be, there's nothing wrong with self-love.

Speaker 1:

Nothing wrong with it and it's not selfish. It's not selfish Because if you can't pour from an empty cup, everybody knows that right, everybody knows that saying you can't pour from an empty cup, and it's true, how can you give?

Speaker 2:

something to someone else if you don't have it, and and sometimes, uh, in dealing with stress, that's what you're doing yeah you've given something yeah or someone your time, your energy, your thought, your blood, sweat and tears. To where?

Speaker 1:

yeah you're running on fumes and then that that goes where it's setting boundaries. That's a scary thing, right for most people, most people, most people don't want to set boundaries because they don't want to, they don't want to come off as selfish or they don't want to come off as like it's my way or how it not that, but what it is is. It's knowing Christians the Sabbath. We have a very hard time taking that day because most times kids are having games.

Speaker 2:

Right.

Speaker 1:

Sometimes we have to work, so all these different things that might come up, we got to do all the X, y and Z. We don't take that day because there's other things that are come up. We got to do all the x, y and z. We don't take that day because there's other things that are there that are taking precedent life, but it's okay to say, hey, I'm taking this sabbath and you can communicate that to your loved ones, to whomever.

Speaker 1:

Hey, this is my day where I'm taking it to be with god or whatever. Whatever it is for you personally, but it's okay to set that boundary. Hey, nobody, I can't move on this day. This is this day is oh, I can't move on this time oh, at this time, this is time I allowed it for me, exactly, and hey communicating with the household yeah and everybody knowing that, that should be fine that's it should go, you know, of good.

Speaker 1:

So I think, just practical tips that everyone can kind of take away from today. When we're dealing with stress Of course, like I said, you're going to deal with it every day so just practical tips for the day to day to make sure that you're getting through your day and managing your stress well for better health. So I would say, start your day, whether it's with gratitude, journaling, prayer, reading your Bible, meditation, whatever that may be, start your day with. Setting the precedent of this is how I'm going to start my day Relaxed, soft.

Speaker 1:

I like I have now what I'm calling slow mornings that's what I've called it where I'm just waking up and I'm just getting immersed in my word and I'm just meditating on that at the start of the day. So now when my day comes, I'm in a different mindset, my body feels different, I'm relaxed, I'm cool. You know I can kind of go throughout my day like that. Now that's not saying that it won't change. Something comes up those stressors, but now I have, because I got in my work that morning for me personally that because that's what I use, I now have those heartbeats of god that that are going to come in throughout my day. I'm going to remember that scripture this morning that I meditated on. You know, be slow to anger, and all those different things you know. I'm now going to meditate on that throughout the day. So when those times come up, I can, you know, use that you have that in your heart.

Speaker 1:

Right, right and that's great.

Speaker 2:

And also with that, after you get that slow start, do a little exercise, maybe a walk, get yourself together. Right, that's the start of your day. Right, to give yourself some extra energy or extra push, uh, to get through the day.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and then also I would say another practical tip just like use apps for guided meditation or like breathing exercises or something like whatever there are. We just I just told you there are a million apps that you can use to help you fall asleep better, to get better sleep, to help you meditate better, to whatever that might be. There's apps for exercise, there's different things that you can utilize in your day-to-day that can help you reduce that stress, lower those cortisol levels and take a step back and kind of visually see okay, this is where I'm at and I'm right now I'm feeling stressed. What can I do to relieve that?

Speaker 2:

and then, like you said, taking those deep breaths, right? Another thing I would encourage while you go on this new journey, right? Uh, I will encourage you to talk to your pcp yeah, right and and just see. I don't know, maybe you don't ain't dealing with stress, maybe it's no other line stress, but it don't hurt to talk to your pcp and to see if you're having headaches or things like that uh, tension in your neck or whatever the case may be.

Speaker 1:

Talk to your pcp, put all these things in order and and and love yourself enough to do that to seek the help that you deserve and so once that happens, you put these things in order and hopefully you see some change yeah, and then I think I guess one last thing I want to add is there's also, like you said, pcp, there's also therapy yeah and that's something that's kind of frowned upon sometimes.

Speaker 1:

Like you said, PCP, there's also therapy. Yeah, and that's something that's kind of frowned upon sometimes. Like you know therapy, and it's like it's a bunch of just stigmas around it. But you have to find what works best for you and it's okay to talk to someone and say is this the best route? Is this the best route? Is cold plunges? My thing Is meditation, my thing Should I talk to a therapist, Whatever that may be? Figure out what works best for you, Because at the end of the day, you deserve it. You deserve to feel good, you deserve to be stress-free and it's just the way of life. We're going to go through things, but you deserve to be able to manage it and feel better about it. So I hope that what you guys got from today's episode just really help you understand that stress impacts every single part of the body and it's something that's going to come up every single moment of the day. But simple practices like meditation, mindfulness, breathing, exercise, switching up the diet or sleep can make a big, big impact and make a difference.

Speaker 2:

And remember, we're not doctors, right? These are some things that we have learned, right? Everyone is different, so please, please, seek guidance of your PCP and we'll go from there. So I hope this has enlightened you and I hope this helped you on your journey. Thank y'all for visiting with us.

Speaker 1:

Yes, and we will see you guys on the next episode. Continue to be great. Continue to journey through life with positivity, love and being stress-free. Okay, anything else you'd like to add to close this out? Love, awesome. All right, we'll see y'all next episode. Bye.

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